The whole time you and your spouse have been together, you’ve felt that there has always been a gap in communication. On one hand, your spouse does the things you ask them to do, and you try to do the same. On the other, you often get into conflicts because they don’t follow through on the things they say they’ll do and often spend more time on work than at home. It’s frustrating and has begun wearing away at your patience.
Being unhappy in your relationship is difficult, which is why you may be looking into divorcing. Even if you have great love for your spouse, your situation may not be working for you. In that case, if you can say that you have decided that a divorce is right for you, then you should consider bringing it up in a conversation with your spouse.
How should you bring up a divorce?
This subject isn’t always easy to bring up. One of the things you can do to start with is to call your attorney and discuss some of the things you want to know about divorcing. You might go over your budget and financial situation first, deciding if now is the right time to consider divorce. Additionally, your attorney might be able to give you more details on options like marriage counseling or mediation, which could help you save your marriage or work through your divorce concerns more easily in the future, depending on your goals.
After you sit down and talk over what your personal goals are, you can talk to your spouse. Choose a time when they are calm and relaxed to have the conversation, because you don’t want to bring up an upsetting topic when you or they are angry or upset, tired or irritated.
Remain respectful during the conversation. You can point out that you want to have a collaborative or calm divorce, and explain your goals and position. If your spouse feels the same as you, you may be able to quickly start the process. If they don’t, then you should consider having a conversation. For some people, this discussion helps them find solutions to stay together. For others, it’s a good way to start discussing how to separate.
