Can a teen refuse to spend time with one parent?

On Behalf of | Jan 28, 2025 | Custody & Parenting

A divorce can have a major impact on family dynamics. Not only does it drastically alter the relationship between the spouses, but it can exacerbate strain in parent-child relationships. Children and teenagers sometimes take sides when their parents divorce. Often, they may be more sympathetic towards the parent who serves as their primary caregiver. Other times, children may blame one parent for the divorce and may insist they don’t want to spend time with that parent.

Small children generally have to do what their parents request of them. However, teenagers often have more autonomy. Can older kids and teens who are subject to a custody order refuse parenting time or visitation with one of their parents?

Minor children do not control custody issues

A custody order retains its legal authority until the children subject to the order become legal adults. In other words, until a teenager turns 18 or finishes high school, they still have to comply with the visitation or parenting time schedule established in a court-issued custody order.

It is the responsibility of the parents to ensure that their children and teenagers comply with the custody order. One parent should not encourage their teen to refuse to spend time with their other parent. The failure to uphold the established custody order could potentially result in custody enforcement or modification hearings.

Judges expect parents to abide by the custody order and to ensure that their children do as well. In some cases, parents may need to have a difficult conversation with a reluctant teenager. Other times, they may need to look into counseling as a way of helping the teen and their parent work on their relationship. Reunification counseling can be helpful in cases where a teen has previously refused to see their parent for weeks or months.

Given enough time together, many teenagers feeling estranged from one of their parents can eventually repair their relationships. It is the responsibility of both parents to put the long-term well-being of their teen ahead of the expediency that comes from giving in to their demands. Learning more about the rules for shared child custody can help parents deal with disagreements. Even when teenagers prefer to stay with one parent, they generally still need to spend time with both.

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